SuperDerek

I've found my new coffee table

2011-06-25T15:24:00.000-07:00

I shall name her Ashley.

Ring shop: hour 6.2

2011-04-30T17:55:00.001-07:00

This equals approx 8 kimbers

Ring shop: hour 6.2

2011-04-30T17:48:00.001-07:00

What 6 hours and a journey through lovecraftian madness looks like.

Ring shop: hour 6

2011-04-30T17:45:00.000-07:00

Maternal VIP loot

Ring shop: hour 6

2011-04-30T17:41:00.000-07:00

Bridal VIP final loot

Ring shop: hour 5.1

2011-04-30T17:08:00.001-07:00

http://m.youtube.com/index?desktop_uri=%2F&gl=US#/watch?v=Bs4zCx5T1XU

Ring shop: hour 5

2011-04-30T16:37:00.001-07:00

Apples eat unicorn funny pi formula yes/no? Tuplets.

Ring shop: hour 4.2

2011-04-30T15:46:00.001-07:00

The VIPs continue their caliguan feast. When I went to drink water at the pond, I was horrified by the visage staring back at me. My strength, my dangerous eyes, my "bad boy who hurts inside and just needs the right woman to rehabilitate me" hair, all are gone. I am a tired wasted shell.

Ring shop: hour 4

2011-04-30T15:33:00.000-07:00

The maternal VIP has found something.

Ring shop: hour 3.9

2011-04-30T15:31:00.001-07:00

We have entered the land of never never. The VIPs flutter from one nugget to the next. Each bite is the most wonderful thing in the world, until they see the next item. Then suddenly it is ashes in their mouths.

Also, my mom is entertaining the idea of buying a new ring for herself as well. My father will be disappointed in me

Ring shop: hour 3.75

2011-04-30T15:26:00.001-07:00

They have found new meat. This journey will never be over. Our last porter, chuck, has abandoned us, abandoned me. I do not blame him.

Ring shop: hour 3.5

2011-04-30T15:15:00.001-07:00

Too tired for fancy journal entries. Energy low. Dying. I've picked my collar. Matte band with shiny edges. I don't know why the gold isn't yellow.

Ring shop: hour 3.00001

2011-04-30T14:41:00.001-07:00

Never mind, I'm good. Mango shakes are delicious.

Ring shop: hour 3

2011-04-30T14:32:00.001-07:00

Dear journal. I fear I have reached Te end of my strength though not the end of the journey. Despite finding the previous carcass pleasing to eat, the VIPs have insisted we leave to try our luck at other hunting grounds as well. My spirit is crushed, my will is exhausted. I understand now, I am in purgatory. I most assuredly died with the others during the vulture attack earlier and simply did not realize i now wander the wastelands, doomed to expunge my sins through the currency of blood and suffering.

Ring shop: hour 2.5

2011-04-30T14:23:00.001-07:00

The VIPs continue to feast, buzzard-like from the belly of the carcass. The meat appears good as neither of them have perished. In a moment of "charity", they have insisted I take a bite. I am afraid of them so I agree.

Also, before I only had the muffin top on my waist to worry about. Now it turns out fatty Derek has friggin muffin tops on each side of his finger too. Super.

Ring shop: hour 2.2

2011-04-30T14:03:00.001-07:00

From adversity comes possible success. While the porter and I were busy chasing down the VIPs, who were under the delusion they were both invisible and super fast, we stumbled
Across another carcass. Showing a strength which belies their small frames, they grasped the head of the carcass and without benefit of knife or machete, they ripped the head off.

Ring shop: hour 2

2011-04-30T13:55:00.001-07:00

We have made emergency camp due to injury (I had to pee). The VIPs show unusual energy and vigor despite the trials so far. Our last remaining porter has pulled me aside and warned me that the VIPs may have stumbled upon thickets of charlie sheen berries earlier. We will have to keep a close eye on them until they slow down/regain feeling in their front teeth...

Ring shop: hour 2

2011-04-30T13:48:00.001-07:00

Remnants of our party have regrouped at the carls jr. We are down to the two VIPs, one porter and myself. We are low on food, water, rifle shells and morale.

Ring shop: hour attack!!?:$:

2011-04-30T13:17:00.001-07:00

Journal, I write this with shaking hands. As we continued our search, we were attacked. Upon entering an area of particularly promising sweet grass, an entire flock of vultures descended on us. We were overwhelmed and the party was scattered. Much to my shame, I fled for my life. I managed to capture one hasty photo of my charges, surrounded by more painted ladies of poor purchase than I have ever seen congregated together outside of my nightmares...

Ring shop: hour 1.1

2011-04-30T13:10:00.001-07:00

As I suspected, first carcass was unfit for consumption. The meat is darkish purple, the blood brackish. We lost one porter who consumed some of the meat before we could restrain him. Toby will be missed.

Ring shop: hour 1

2011-04-30T12:56:00.001-07:00

Entry 2: they seem to be circling one particularly tasty carcass. I am not fooled. Much like intrepid British explorers in the Golgi desert, I know that relief and succor are actually days away. You will not fool me mirage.

Ring shop: hour .5

2011-04-30T12:47:00.000-07:00

I could be on fire right now, and they wouldn't notice.

Bye LA, you were alright...

2011-04-14T23:48:00.001-07:00

> Hello SF, you are still the best...
>

7 yards. New gun. Half speed.

2009-11-03T18:16:00.000-08:00

celebration

2008-10-28T18:32:00.000-07:00

Ding dong the witch is laid off...

topography car!

2008-10-12T12:35:00.000-07:00

weak

2008-10-05T15:54:00.000-07:00

My ass + $1 kid's chair = sadness.

this food breaks up homes.

2008-10-04T14:14:00.000-07:00

snow cones!

2008-06-20T17:48:00.000-07:00

My local bar has a snow cone machine!

money

2008-06-01T09:19:00.000-07:00

hot crotch

2008-05-26T16:49:00.000-07:00

mother's day

2008-05-17T19:32:00.000-07:00

Mom and grandma about to get their crab on.

driving gold

2008-04-26T10:14:00.001-07:00

you can drive a lancer...but can you drive one at 60 mph with one foot hanging out the window?

breast feeding, tron-style.

2008-04-25T09:26:00.000-07:00

i feel safer already.

2008-04-25T09:11:00.000-07:00

Motorized enforcement tricycles...a segway without the catlike agility.

national marital aide

2008-04-25T05:35:00.000-07:00

white house 2

2008-04-25T05:33:00.000-07:00

Around the back a ways. Nope, no ones getting in through the exhaust vent with that awesome fence there.

white house 1

2008-04-25T05:24:00.000-07:00

The front

the bbq results...

2008-04-24T16:02:00.000-07:00

Eh. The food is a solid 6. The bourbon choice... An 8.5...

1st dinner in dc

2008-04-24T15:33:00.000-07:00

Old glory bbq. I was going to pass on this place until i saw that they feature their bourbon menu more prominently that their food. A good sign...

hitting the demographic

2008-04-22T21:13:00.000-07:00

Safeway is getting all ethnic...

nerd reservoir dogs...

2008-04-19T22:00:00.000-07:00

saturday night drinks 2

2008-04-19T20:23:00.000-07:00

saturday night drinks 1

2008-04-19T20:19:00.000-07:00

thank you whole foods

2008-04-10T20:40:00.000-07:00

Thank you whole foods. Thank you for bacon chocolate.

black keys concert #2

2008-04-02T21:32:00.000-07:00

black keys concert #1

2008-04-02T21:29:00.000-07:00

opening act for black keys

2008-04-02T20:35:00.000-07:00

No idea what their names are...

white trash sangria

2008-04-02T18:20:00.000-07:00

1/2 red wine, 1/2 coke. Surprisingly good. Actually taste kind of like sangria.

wow

2008-03-30T11:37:00.000-07:00

Just....wow.

word...

2008-03-29T16:59:00.000-07:00

Never has caution tape been so wise...

best fud in town!

2008-03-29T16:37:00.000-07:00

I know i want some "homus" and "foul falafel".

all you can eat indian

2008-03-27T19:38:00.000-07:00

At india palace!

absolutely no commentary needed.

2008-03-25T20:58:00.000-07:00

Frostbite is the new Black

2008-03-25T10:58:00.000-07:00

My buddy Dave just got some new shoes from this place:

http://www.vibramfivefingers.com/

And the picture is of him wearing them at a wedding.

Note how well he sports the "I chose to not bring proper equipement when I summitted Everest, and I have now decided to go rock a wedding before going to the amputation hospital..." look.

monday bar!

2008-03-24T19:36:00.000-07:00

The knockout. Their mascot is a drunk luchidore.

funny

2008-03-19T11:18:00.000-07:00

I swear i wasn't the one who arranged them like that.

that's messed up...

2008-03-14T18:09:00.000-07:00

Translation: FAT!

pi day celebration

2008-03-14T14:24:00.000-07:00

3.14 lbs of fruit medley to celebrate the most noble and enigmatic of constants.

don ramon

2008-03-12T20:27:00.000-07:00

Great wed dinner!

wednesday

2008-03-12T19:36:00.000-07:00

A hard day rewarded.

@ work

2008-03-07T14:34:00.000-08:00

Between analysis, i needed to illustrate something for an all hands meeting. That's right, i'm getting paid to draw drunk rifle wielding leprechauns. My job could be worse...

first poll

2008-03-07T10:01:00.000-08:00

Is this a girl's water bottle or a boy's water bottle?

really?

2008-03-06T23:11:00.000-08:00

National geographic. Fine historians of indigenous people, exotic wildlife, and apparently, U2 3d movies...

kezar pub wings!

2008-03-06T22:26:00.000-08:00

My friend ate like 90% of this.

My Yosemite Trip

2008-03-04T13:57:00.000-08:00

It started out poorly, but I came through in the end.

i don't know who they are

2008-02-28T20:51:00.000-08:00

But they think very highly of themselves.

zeitgeist

2008-02-28T18:45:00.000-08:00

$11.50, not bad.

comicon 3

2008-02-28T17:05:00.000-08:00

The main floor. It smells vaguely like old taco meat...

comicon 2

2008-02-28T14:22:00.000-08:00

These guys were selling 70's porn. Note the smirks on their faces.

comicon

2008-02-28T13:58:00.000-08:00

Yes, those are cobra soldiers shopping for comics.

Beginning Of A Great Thursday

2008-02-21T19:45:00.000-08:00

First Post

2008-02-21T13:23:00.000-08:00

Man, that lady needs a shave actually...

First Post

2008-02-21T13:14:00.000-08:00

Based on the water bottle, this lady really loves her pastels...

2007-05-02T18:22:00.000-07:00

32 birthday

2007-05-02T18:19:00.000-07:00

test

2007-03-15T13:19:00.000-07:00